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Ranma1/2
09-07-2009, 08:14 AM
Ok, funny fap story. So today I was taking care of the garden in the backyard, and I got a couple of blisters during the work. When I'm all done and tired, I go, and I'm like, "hey, I'll fap before I go take a shower!" I fap to some awesome ΘΘΘΘ, I shoot up some semen, and when it lands, I feel something really hot, REALLY hot. It was burning really bad. My eyes were on the computer screen for a while while I was thinking "Ow ow ow ow, why is my semen so fucking hot?!" I look down and noticed some of the cum landed on my blister which is on my thumb. The blister was partially open, and the cum got inside where the sensitive part is when it's sore. It hurt like a bitch. :E56G:

Remember to never fap without a bandaid on your blisters. :E53:

Drgentile777
09-07-2009, 08:19 AM
Wow... Thanks for sharing this with us. And for the warning.

Laharl-san
09-07-2009, 08:19 AM
Ok, funny fap story. So today I was taking care of the garden in the backyard, and I got a couple of blisters during the work. When I'm all done and tired, I go, and I'm like, "hey, I'll fap before I go take a shower!" I fap to some awesome ΘΘΘΘ, I shoot up some semen, and when it lands, I feel something really hot, REALLY hot. It was burning really bad. My eyes were on the computer screen for a while while I was thinking "Ow ow ow ow, why is my semen so fucking hot?!" I look down and noticed some of the cum landed on my blister which is on my thumb. The blister was partially open, and the cum got inside where the sensitive part is when it's sore. It hurt like a bitch. :E56G:

Remember to never fap without a bandaid on your blisters. :E53:

You just managed to cum inside youself

Nored
09-07-2009, 09:17 AM
Ok, funny fap story. So today I was taking care of the garden in the backyard, and I got a couple of blisters during the work. When I'm all done and tired, I go, and I'm like, "hey, I'll fap before I go take a shower!" I fap to some awesome ΘΘΘΘ, I shoot up some semen, and when it lands, I feel something really hot, REALLY hot. It was burning really bad. My eyes were on the computer screen for a while while I was thinking "Ow ow ow ow, why is my semen so fucking hot?!" I look down and noticed some of the cum landed on my blister which is on my thumb. The blister was partially open, and the cum got inside where the sensitive part is when it's sore. It hurt like a bitch. :E56G:

Remember to never fap without a bandaid on your blisters. :E53:

Wouldn't it suck if you got a blister inside your penis?

Taser
09-07-2009, 06:55 PM
whahwhahahahah thas so funny lol. its fuckin hilarious hahahhahaha. ur the first guy ive known who managed that loool

fooleh
09-07-2009, 07:56 PM
I remember reading something about semen being slightly basic. Getting a non ph-neutral substance under your skin, acidic or basic, should hurt or sting. Like when you put hydrogen peroxide on a cut. Probably not that bad, though.

Nored
09-07-2009, 08:45 PM
I remember reading something about semen being slightly basic. Getting a non ph-neutral substance under your skin, acidic or basic, should hurt or sting. Like when you put hydrogen peroxide on a cut. Probably not that bad, though.

Aha! The solution has arrived! If we want to fap with blisters, all we need is something acidic nearby to neutralize the semen!

ahra
09-08-2009, 10:39 AM
*facepalm*

sanctaphrax
09-08-2009, 12:41 PM
The title of the thread is so misleading -_-

ahra
09-08-2009, 02:09 PM
no, little stella, protect your innocence!

*drags stella away*

Konradz
09-08-2009, 02:14 PM
This thread inspires me.

I feel reborn again.



Beautiful. Simply beautiful.
Amen, Konrad.

Sword Dancer
09-08-2009, 07:42 PM
I didn't think the guy's story was funny, but these responses are hilarious...

xxmangooz
09-08-2009, 07:49 PM
I didn't think the guy's story was funny, but these responses are hilarious...

Totally agreed xD

タケル
09-09-2009, 04:07 AM
Lol............

Tina_1991
09-09-2009, 03:02 PM
:nonono: OH MY GOD?! WHY did I read this?? ... Anyway, it was funny :innocence2:
Maybe you should put a emergency contraception pill in your blister, you could get pregnant! :hahaha:

ZellionBunny
09-09-2009, 03:07 PM
^congratulations, your mind just got deflowerd!
*gives a prize*
x

Kurikara_
09-09-2009, 03:26 PM
now i just realized there is not enough therpy to save me now. :iamdead:

great thanks.

black_out
09-09-2009, 04:04 PM
Prolly you did it to fast...numerous reasons meit. :D

zetsui
09-09-2009, 05:51 PM
I didn't think the guy's story was funny, but these responses are hilarious...
this is not funny for me either but a friend of mine did the same thing in the shower and the poor guy slipped on his semen & fell on the bathroom floor......in the hospital room, he was like "got like this from fight club" & put on a hero's expression (his sis told us what really happened) XXXXXPPP

Nickless
09-09-2009, 06:36 PM
Oh my God...


facepalm.jpg

Pirate Lena
09-09-2009, 06:58 PM
I've lost a little bit of my soul, reading that.

RegalFighter
09-09-2009, 07:02 PM
LOL! the title is so misleading XD

Nickless
09-09-2009, 07:14 PM
I've lost a little bit of my soul, reading that.

Just a bit? I feel like shooting my own foot.

Tessu
09-09-2009, 07:36 PM
Hopefully your blistered thumb won't get pregnant!

Nored
09-09-2009, 10:39 PM
Hopefully your blistered thumb won't get pregnant!

Aye, that's why you should always use a condom. No glove, no love.

dkeehoe
09-13-2009, 09:56 AM
karate_chopping_your_balls.avi

Mr.Freeman
09-13-2009, 12:22 PM
i lol'd for like 20 min. at these responses... i have something that's alittle bit like this...

so i was at my friends house, i've known her for a couple years and we were "up in her room" and we were finishing up "she was doing oral on me" and her mom came home... and we rushed to get dressed and run down stairs and act like nothing was going on..but i forgot to wash my hands off "combination of her juices and my stuff on my hand" "just a little bit of it was on my hand though so" her mom walks in and i wave at her with the juice hand...and she's like..what is that on your hand...i just realized what was on it...and i said...i just sneezed into my hand..

let that be a lesson to all of you...make sure your hands are clean.

glatiatorix
09-13-2009, 07:12 PM
i lol'd for like 20 min. at these responses... i have something that's alittle bit like this...

so i was at my friends house, i've known her for a couple years and we were "up in her room" and we were finishing up "she was doing oral on me" and her mom came home... and we rushed to get dressed and run down stairs and act like nothing was going on..but i forgot to wash my hands off "combination of her juices and my stuff on my hand" "just a little bit of it was on my hand though so" her mom walks in and i wave at her with the juice hand...and she's like..what is that on your hand...i just realized what was on it...and i said...i just sneezed into my hand..

let that be a lesson to all of you...make sure your hands are clean.

Quite a funny story we have here too, lol and it was a close call. Good idea of sneezing, even though it doesn't look appealing, it still save you lot's of trouble.:smoker:

hairclip
09-14-2009, 06:53 PM
oooch that must of hurt alot. but oh my

eaz51
09-15-2009, 05:09 PM
You just managed to cum inside youself

that was great

~ Warlock-kun ~
09-15-2009, 05:55 PM
XD That fails so much it wraps around into win somehow... XD

NitroSan
09-15-2009, 06:17 PM
tsk tsk
Cut must hurt

zetsui
10-02-2009, 07:13 PM
XD That fails so much it wraps around into win somehow... XD


I'll up you one......pal of mine was watching p0rn in his room, door closed, speakers up max ,pipi out of pants......mom walked into room with some laundry...guy had to make a choice: flick off monitor, tune down speaker or put back pipi in pants...moron froze on the spot..mom didn't notice though

-Bk201-
10-18-2009, 02:40 AM
I'll up you one......pal of mine was watching p0rn in his room, door closed, speakers up max ,pipi out of pants......mom walked into room with some laundry...guy had to make a choice: flick off monitor, tune down speaker or put back pipi in pants...moron froze on the spot..mom didn't notice though
LOL really? who could be that blind T_T and the title of this thread is misleading but gotta admit that was epik win ...somehow.....

Soxx
10-18-2009, 02:57 AM
The title of the thread is so misleading -_-

Indeed but fucking epic xD

Sora_Dono
10-18-2009, 03:40 PM
You just managed to cum inside youself
hahahaha this is a line to remember ^__^
@ topic
well semen is hot by nature and i dont see any reason to panic(especialy if its cold weather and your body is cold when it lands on you it feels extra hot, i know i had it happen to me in the good old days when i was careless with thet kind of stuff :sic:)

CatAlin
10-20-2009, 11:48 AM
Fuhahaha, sorry, but that's just utterly hilariously funny on the first read and thought.
Yes, always wear bandaids or, if one hand is without blistered, use that.

C-A

Mitsuki'91
10-27-2009, 07:53 PM
I lolled at this. xD Honestly, this is so bloody hilarious.

So, men, what have we learned today?

Laharl-san
10-28-2009, 04:58 AM
I lolled at this. xD Honestly, this is so bloody hilarious.

So, men, what have we learned today?

Don't cum inside yourself...it burns like hell.

jologs16
10-28-2009, 05:09 AM
Bwahahahaha XD

Tsunaru
10-28-2009, 09:03 AM
So many facepalm threads, so little time

basti'
10-28-2009, 06:20 PM
So many facepalm threads, so little time


So true! *sign*

ahra
10-30-2009, 03:23 AM
facepalm too many times and it gives you headache.

this thread should've stayed dead >.>

Narcissus
10-30-2009, 04:51 AM
You've probably got your answer so far but I'm gonna answer to your question anyway:

1. Your semen belongs to the Body Fluids' category. It was inside you right before you ejaculated (less than a sec ago). So of course it would be hot. It has the temperature of your body - which is slightly higher than normal when you're "excited".

2. It stung when it fell on your blister because it contains acids. (just like your sweat) So don't worry about that either, you're actually normal.


P.S. I really hope your washed your blistered hand thoughrouly... **shivers**

Yozo-kun
10-30-2009, 08:16 AM
:sic::hot::twitching:now im brain damaged :*^8: :kiddy:

Nored
10-30-2009, 09:03 PM
You've probably got your answer so far but I'm gonna answer to your question anyway:

1. Your semen belongs to the Body Fluids' category. It was inside you right before you ejaculated (less than a sec ago). So of course it would be hot. It has the temperature of your body - which is slightly higher than normal when you're "excited".

2. It stung when it fell on your blister because it contains acids. (just like your sweat) So don't worry about that either, you're actually normal.


P.S. I really hope your washed your blistered hand thoughrouly... **shivers**

I thought semen was slightly basic.

Narcissus
10-30-2009, 09:25 PM
I thought semen was slightly basic.

I just found this in wikipedia about semen components and whether it's basic or acidic

During the process of ejaculation (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ejaculation), sperm (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sperm) passes through the ejaculatory ducts (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ejaculatory_duct) and mixes with fluids from the seminal vesicles (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Seminal_vesicle), the prostate (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Prostate), and the bulbourethral glands (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bulbourethral_gland) to form the semen. The seminal vesicles produce a yellowish viscous fluid rich in fructose and other substances that makes up about 70% of human semen. The prostatic secretion, influenced by dihydrotestosterone, is a whitish (sometimes clear), thin fluid containing proteolytic enzymes, citric acid, acid phosphatase and lipids. The bulbourethral glands secrete a clear secretion into the lumen of the urethra (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Urethra) to lubricate it.

Basic amines (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Amines) such as putrescine (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Putrescine), spermine (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Spermine), spermidine (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Spermidine) and cadaverine (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cadaverine) are responsible for the smell and flavor of semen. These alkaline bases counteract the acidic environment of the vaginal canal, and protect DNA (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/DNA) inside the sperm (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sperm) from acidic denaturation.


Right before the ejaculation the alkalines mix with the semen. It might in fact belong in the alkalines category but it still contains lots of different acidic fluids, vitamin C etc which would cause the stinging feeling in an open wound or damaged skin. He had an open blister afterall...!!!

P.S. It feels like I'm back in highschool for Biology class!

Nored
10-31-2009, 10:46 AM
That's odd. I was taught that sperm couldn't survive in the acidic environments of the urethra, so the semen contained something slightly basic in order to neutralize the acidity of the urethra.

Narcissus
10-31-2009, 10:55 AM
Sperm can't survive in the extra acidic vaginal environment

Pelsia
10-31-2009, 09:01 PM
Though I don't think was the cause given the circumstances, if the guys is sick (must be feverish) his semen can come out hotter than usual. Funny story behind that, a girlfriend of mine went to visit her boyfriend one day when he was sick. Despite really being quite sick, they still went after it (easily the horniest pair I've know) and when he sprayed her back as the finishing move she started crying, "ah, its hot!!!!".

Other things can influence its state as well, if the guy drinks pineapple juice for an extended period of time the semen will become much sweater and take on some of the flavour aspects that the juice has. I wouldn't describe it as being tasty, but I guess you could say much less distasteful than the usual.

Nored
10-31-2009, 09:57 PM
Though I don't think was the cause given the circumstances, if the guys is sick (must be feverish) his semen can come out hotter than usual. Funny story behind that, a girlfriend of mine went to visit her boyfriend one day when he was sick. Despite really being quite sick, they still went after it (easily the horniest pair I've know) and when he sprayed her back as the finishing move she started crying, "ah, its hot!!!!".

Other things can influence its state as well, if the guy drinks pineapple juice for an extended period of time the semen will become much sweater and take on some of the flavour aspects that the juice has. I wouldn't describe it as being tasty, but I guess you could say much less distasteful than the usual.

I'll keep that in mind.

Too bad I'm allergic to pineapple. Life sucks.

Pelsia
10-31-2009, 10:32 PM
I'll keep that in mind.

Too bad I'm allergic to pineapple. Life sucks.

That's a shame, so far that's the only method that myself, or other gf's I've talked to them about have had any kind of "success" in being more, errr receptive I guess you could say to doing what all you guys dream about :ml22:

With your situation might try apple juice, pear or peach juice, or something like the Kern banana/strawberry nectar (which is yummy anyways). Usually takes about a week before the changes take effect.

Virus465
10-31-2009, 11:01 PM
I've managed to avoid this thread...XD

...wish I had managed to control my curiosity more...but no...Man this is just stupid. I have to admit, funny, but stupid.

Congrats you managed to cum inside yourself *Insert Shemale Joke here*.

Can wait to see that messed up child. XD

BurningSoul
11-01-2009, 02:57 AM
Really . . all of the guys dream of that ? Me too ?

And why do you people insist on posting in this fucked up thread anyway .

Pelsia
11-01-2009, 07:11 AM
The threads name is like a sign that says, "Do not enter"; its so tantalizing that your curiosity forces you to take a peep.:ml67:

Kuroi Mitsukai
11-01-2009, 08:46 AM
all I can say to this is wow.


Ok, funny fap story. So today I was taking care of the garden in the backyard, and I got a couple of blisters during the work. When I'm all done and tired, I go, and I'm like, "hey, I'll fap before I go take a shower!" I fap to some awesome ΘΘΘΘ, I shoot up some semen, and when it lands, I feel something really hot, REALLY hot. It was burning really bad. My eyes were on the computer screen for a while while I was thinking "Ow ow ow ow, why is my semen so fucking hot?!" I look down and noticed some of the cum landed on my blister which is on my thumb. The blister was partially open, and the cum got inside where the sensitive part is when it's sore. It hurt like a bitch. :E56G:

Remember to never fap without a bandaid on your blisters. :E53:

Wisteria
11-04-2009, 09:56 AM
ok gratz... I'm a newbie here and I'm already scared, thnx to your lolstory. I don't have the words.... *runs away*

Pelsia
11-04-2009, 12:01 PM
Guys seem to like to "surprise" us and have gotten my fair share of icky hot ones, or times they've gone into a cut in the arm. Almost like a chemical fire, more water you put on it the worse it gets :punch:

affie
11-14-2009, 08:21 AM
Dude, your story is hilarious. You manage to cum inside yourself. Congrats, your prob the first guy who came in himself :P. That calls for a toast. I toast to healthy fapping experiences in the near future. Amen.

Do you know that the name of your thread is really misleading. I was hoping a girl made this thread and was talking about tasting warm semen in her mouth. Now I find out it's a guy who came in himself and asking why his semen is warm. I think most of the girls will avoid the word "semen" on this forum. So I don't think you'll get a lot of answers from girls.


this is not funny for me either but a friend of mine did the same thing in the shower and the poor guy slipped on his semen & fell on the bathroom floor......in the hospital room, he was like "got like this from fight club" & put on a hero's expression (his sis told us what really happened) XXXXXPPP
OOOOOMMMMMMMMGGGGGG!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Slipping on your own semen. classic XD XD XD. I'm trying to imagine what that would look like. *OOOOOMYGOOOOOOOOOOOD* That was AWESOME!!!! I can't stop laughing :) :) :P

KAITO
02-14-2010, 11:16 AM
That's a shame, so far that's the only method that myself, or other gf's I've talked to them about have had any kind of "success" in being more, errr receptive I guess you could say to doing what all you guys dream about :ml22:

With your situation might try apple juice, pear or peach juice, or something like the Kern banana/strawberry nectar (which is yummy anyways). Usually takes about a week before the changes take effect.


what about Coke :)...does it do

cry3160
06-11-2010, 08:43 AM
Wouldn't it suck if you got a blister inside your penis?

raise hand
got chicken pox when i was 14
peeing hurts it got all the way in *there*
the urethra
hurt like hell every time i pee

jonadrian619
06-20-2010, 03:44 AM
@affie-kun: I agree.

This thread is simply amazing. I also hereby congratulate you, Ranma-kun, for cumming inside yourself.
The thread title is indeed misleading. With that, you won't get much advice from the girls except a few other comments which won't probably help you out. ^^

Ekureiru
07-20-2010, 10:32 AM
I have nothing other than the following to say to you, Ranma: Bravo.

This thread was excellent, and the misleading title, strangely disturbing yet amusing story following it, and the entirety of it's contents (I mean, even the comments after the initial post) are brilliant. You've managed to cum inside yourself, today. You should feel like an accomplished man with that great achievement wrapped around your belt.

Now, tiger, your ferocity is known to the world!

Fai-kun
08-11-2010, 07:49 PM
Words cannot express my feelings on how this thread beautifully developed given its misleading title and its unique story. If experience is a game, you will be the only person to be ever get the achievement of 'Cumming into your own self'. *parody on Steam achievements*

Other than that, let us toast to the wonderful fapping life. XD

Narukahana
08-17-2010, 07:30 AM
You've done a good job at deflowering yourself.

-kronos-
08-17-2010, 10:10 AM
You just managed to cum inside youself

thats ... there are no words for how funny that is it made my day:Ayociexp119:
and well yeah thanks for the heads up. "never jerk after hard work i guess"

ZeroJaeger
10-08-2010, 06:07 PM
Originally Posted by Laharl-san http://img1.nihonomaru.com/forum/images/nihonomaru/buttons/viewpost.gif (http://forum.nihonomaru.com/taokaka-disscussion/139737-why-my-semen-hot-post1536510.html#post1536510)
You just managed to cum inside youself

That is the sexiest thing I have ever heard. XD

Kouzenji
12-26-2010, 06:02 AM
You just managed to cum inside youself

One word
SELFCEST

AkitaKun
02-08-2011, 05:47 AM
the title is kinda misleading...
and congratz for deflowering yourself
a winner is you
XD

tdiddy150
02-08-2011, 12:31 PM
in reply to what is goin on in this thread...
http://puntabulous.com/wp-content/cookie-monster-wtf-is-this.jpg

NeverDie565
03-12-2011, 05:10 AM
i lol'd for like 20 min. at these responses... i have something that's alittle bit like this...

so i was at my friends house, i've known her for a couple years and we were "up in her room" and we were finishing up "she was doing oral on me" and her mom came home... and we rushed to get dressed and run down stairs and act like nothing was going on..but i forgot to wash my hands off "combination of her juices and my stuff on my hand" "just a little bit of it was on my hand though so" her mom walks in and i wave at her with the juice hand...and she's like..what is that on your hand...i just realized what was on it...and i said...i just sneezed into my hand..

let that be a lesson to all of you...make sure your hands are clean.

omg i lol'd so hard at your story

amilgaoul
04-29-2011, 11:45 AM
Mr.Freeman
i lol'd for like 20 min. at these responses... i have something that's alittle bit like this...

so i was at my friends house, i've known her for a couple years and we were "up in her room" and we were finishing up "she was doing oral on me" and her mom came home... and we rushed to get dressed and run down stairs and act like nothing was going on..but i forgot to wash my hands off "combination of her juices and my stuff on my hand" "just a little bit of it was on my hand though so" her mom walks in and i wave at her with the juice hand...and she's like..what is that on your hand...i just realized what was on it...and i said...i just sneezed into my hand..

let that be a lesson to all of you...make sure your hands are clean.

http://msnrules.com/emoticons/soldier/31.gifhttp://msnrules.com/emoticons/soldier/31.gifhttp://msnrules.com/emoticons/soldier/31.gif
LOL....did she believe it...??

and for the main thread...
thanks for the info.. ^_^

and to know everything about semen check this out (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Semen)
it'll be useful

Zerolee
04-29-2011, 11:52 AM
funny i will remember not to do it when i got wounds close by

adeng
07-03-2011, 09:39 AM
haha. reaLLy nice to read stories Like these. :) It made me Laugh, though I'm not really sure I follow aLL your situations and opinions. :) thanks for the Laugh.

guguBear2012
11-06-2011, 09:44 PM
that.. was actually kind of funny
you know my man also "faps" (?) but after he takes the shower.. (he told me that way before i dated him) =))

kinda sounds weird to me now

Sym Gill
12-20-2013, 08:54 AM
Your semen should always be hot. LMAO

RandyLim
03-13-2014, 01:03 PM
It's way too spicy..you need to reduce your intake in spicy stuff.

and I LOL'd

nibf
03-21-2014, 11:43 PM
because it came from inside you duh! your body temperature is warmer than the environment's temperature

Kero
09-02-2014, 06:00 PM
Ok, funny fap story. So today I was taking care of the garden in the backyard, and I got a couple of blisters during the work. When I'm all done and tired, I go, and I'm like, "hey, I'll fap before I go take a shower!" I fap to some awesome ΘΘΘΘ, I shoot up some semen, and when it lands, I feel something really hot, REALLY hot. It was burning really bad. My eyes were on the computer screen for a while while I was thinking "Ow ow ow ow, why is my semen so fucking hot?!" I look down and noticed some of the cum landed on my blister which is on my thumb. The blister was partially open, and the cum got inside where the sensitive part is when it's sore. It hurt like a bitch. :E56G:

Remember to never fap without a bandaid on your blisters. :E53:

That was really graphic ... thanks