self confident

[great-sasuke]

I want some advices to have more confidence when I´m near of a girl that I like, because I´m too shy and I have noticed that what a girls like the most is a self confident guy, so plz, any advices(consejos) that anyone can give to be more confident will be greatly appreciated.

[Silmeria]

grabs one nut and risk it and if it goes wrong hold the consecuences, is that or be always scared ^^

[Daniel.]

Yeah man sometimes you just have to push yourself. Regardless of whats going to happen. If it doesn't work out 80/100 chance you'll never see her again so you never have to be embarrassed. Those are good odds bro.

[xtehlegendx]

i think it is better to join a speech and debate team! it gives you the confidence to speak to a crowd and maybe help you with relationships! I dont think you should risk anything at any moment, but maybe it's just me, but if it's a girl you like for a long time and you hang out with her then you might be able to risk it, but i have never tried confronting a girl i just like but never talked too!

[lan60000]

I think he should think on a larger scale than just the present time itself and evaluated the pro's and con's when he confesses to someone.

First, think of all the good points you have and the good points people tell you that you have (friends, family, other girls, etc), and dont tell me you got none because that's impossible.
Second, keep thinking of those good points to remind you how great of a person you are to keep your morale high when you walk up to that girl.
Third, think about the future if you confessed to the girl you love. If she had said yes, then your dream pretty much came true and you'll feel like you just scored 100 on all your tests or won the national championship at some sports. Apart from that, she'll be with you and you'll be able to express your love to her more and more. Think about how happy you'll be when you succeed, and focus on that success. If by some miracle that you've failed, then it's not much of a big deal. It only meant you two werent meant to be, and it gives you the potential to find someone far better in the long run. To me, it's a win-win situation, so full charge ahead bud. :)

[taconapsack]

That is true, but the real courage is just walking up to her.
It is all about the mindset, I think.
Walking up to her is more than half the battle and if anything think of them as future friends rather than someone you would want to go out with you are able to talk more casually.
It helped me a lot.

[MMao]

go smackz a bad guy and throw urself into a streetfightz several timez, tat way u'll b damn brave 4 sure

[Daniel.]

It doesn't matter how good you are at speaking, if you have no self confidence then you'll never do it. Theres a difference between having huge muscles and knowing how to box in a ring. You can be born with something but if you don't know how to use it, your going to be beaten by the person who earned it and gained the knowledge and skill on the way.

Same thing applies to this. He needs more self confidence.

[great-sasuke]

good advices, I know that I need more self confident and what I want to know how obtain that confidence

[toadvine]

Self confidence really can only be gained through experience - if you're not confident talking to girls, just keep trying until you're well at ease with them, don't worry about the consequences, don't get ahead of yourself, just think about what you're doing as you're doing it. It's a lot easier to talk to a girl when you're only thinking "hey, talking to cute girls is fun!" instead of "Oh gods oh gods what if she doesn't like me and what if she does and I bet she's look really great with no clothes but oh crap I just made a fool of myself and I've been staring at her for wayyy too long dang this is embarassing." *approximation of my train of thought talking to girls I liked when I was in junior high*

Once you've got all the clutter out of your mind, you can converse pretty normally and just speak your mind - girls usually don't get offended when you tell them you think they're pretty; just use common sense when you choose your wording! "That shirt looks really good on you" goes over much better than "zomg I can see ur boobz!"

After that, you're pretty much in - talk about common interests (assuming you have some,) talk to her about HER interests even if you don't share them, if the opportunity arises, tell her (briefly!) how great you are, and then if things seem to be going well, get her number and/or set up a date!

Still though, the main thing is to just do it. Yeah, you'll get shot down sometimes, but a wise man won't focus on the five that say no, he'll focus on the one that says yes!